She did it!

Rowen did it, she gave her pacies to the pacie fairy. At the last minute, she didn't want to put them in the envelope, but she did. Then she helped me place them on the back porch (we didn't want anyone to steal the present that would be left for her in exchange for the pacies). She had a difficult time going to sleep. Finally, I brought her in bed with me while Steve worked on some songs on the computer. It took Rowen almost an hour to fall asleep, which she did holding my hand. It was so sweet, but I felt very sad for her. I remember having to give up a baby blanket I had had for years. When it was finally in pieces and I had to get rid of it, I cried and cried. And I was seven years old.

After a whole day of her not having her pacies, I wonder if we did the right thing. It took over an hour for her to go to sleep for her nap, again, laying in bed with me, holding hands. She didn't scream or ask for her pacies back, she just quietly cried, sometimes putting her hand over her eyes. When she wasn't looking, I cried with her. I want her to grow up, but I hate feeling like I'm rushing her. I know this will be better for her in the long run, but it breaks my heart to see her feel so lost trying to sleep without her pacifiers. I'm very glad Logan never liked pacifiers. If we are ever blessed with one more little one, I definitely will try to forego the whole pacie thing. It's just not worth it.